Shattered

Events unfold in life. Some are so significant that we wake up in the morning, and not one second of our lives is the same as the day before. Some call it grieving. I call it healing. My life will never be the same, nor will I. My brain was in a fog. Some called it the "Widow's brain". There was no room in my head to accommodate what was occurring around me. It may be vulnerable; I term it raw. We are exposed. There is no head space to do anything else. I have since found that it does not only happen as a widow. Dealing with death presents this. Many life-changing events occur. Shattered, I look at the pieces of myself as I became a different person. Which pieces will I pick up as I continue through this life journey? What ones will I replace with new ones? How do I accomplish this task without my brain being clear? How many dangers are around me that lead to deception of self? Psalms 91:3 reads, "Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare and from the deadly pestilence." Honesty comes out of my mouth unfiltered. Self-honesty is much more difficult. I can convince myself I am solid and unafraid when I am neither.

 Whether I acknowledge it or not, I will become bitter or better. My actions will display my choice.

This weekend presented me with situations that produced thought. It lead me to research significant words—integrity, truth, and dignity. The shattered pieces I gather to move forward with must come from these simple but meaningful words. God placed them in my head and heart for a reason. He will guide me.

Jeremiah 29:11-13  "11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Integrity:

Dictionary: Formal reserve or seriousness of manner, appearance, or language

 The quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed

 I know, my God, that you test the heart and are pleased with integrity. All these things I have given willingly and with honest intent. And now I have seen with joy how willingly your people who are here have given to you. 1 Chronicles 29:17

The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity. Proverbs 11:13

Truth:

 Dictionary: The body of real things, events, and facts: REALITY

 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. 1John 3:18

 An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. Proverbs 24:26

And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

Dignity:

Dictionary: Calm, serious and controlled behavior that makes people respect you.

Women must likewise be dignified, not malicious gossips, but temperate, faithful in all things.

 1 Timothy 3:11

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31:25

 "She speaks with wisdom and teaches with kindness. She opens her mouth with discretion, and on her tongue is the law of kindness."  Proverbs 31:25-26:

 The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1

 God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day. Psalms 46:5

nan*